My Readings: Feminism from Mona El-Tahawy view

 I am happy I have continued reading the book (The Seven Necessary Sins For Women and Girls), and this is a sequel to my previous article.

The next sin or I mearn chapter in Eltahawy's book was Attention. And I have seen strong, independent, talented women called whore bitches just because they stood up and grabbed what they deserve. A man would have never been called so if or maybe better when he does the same thing. Since I was part of the Egyptian Revolution I have a feel for what Mona describes about attention. I think the 25th of Jan and the days that followed broke something loose in many egyptians and especially egyptian women. I saw women getting bolder and not any more being apologetic for being women, but really taking what they deserve not caring what they are called.

Then comes Profanity, where again, me and Mona Eltahawy don't see eye to eye. I don't see the need to be angry nor profane to get what we need or deserve. Profanity is not a tool I can promote or accept. I am against, completely against how patriarchy had used a girl or a female's body part to signify weakness, stupidity and profanity.  It is really interesting how the author noted that she now uses "don't be a little kitten" or "cry like a kitten" instead of the patriarchy's "like a girl". That is nice.

But again, why do I need to say either. I am so moved by the anger and negative vibe that radiates from a big portion of the book. I do not think the world requires any more anger, we need to stand for ourselves but not to end up with inflated egos and  anger. Because then we will be no better than the patriarchy we are complaining of. We need to be conscious of where we are coming from and why we are doing this, really.

Ambitions is sin number 4 and that is a great chapter with so many examples that show how this world was designed just to kill ambition in women just because they have wombs. And yes it can be seen till this day and in the most civilised and advanced societies that being a woman, a mother you are at a disadvantage. It was an amazing experience reading about the Japanese University where they were unfairly assessing women to "rescue the boys". The boys needed rescuing because the girls were getting better marks and would have been accepted instead of the boys!!!!! And they weren't even apologetic for doing that!!!!!

Power is sin number 5. Power, women in power, examples of women gaining power and claiming positions of power without asking for permission is very powerful, in my opinion, to every girl and woman. Gives hope, a silver lining that if they can do it, you can do it.

Violence is sin 6 and again here she lost me. The whole predicament of the chapter is that we need to increase women’s violence against men to balance the scale not decrease men’s violence. I am with women defending themselves when attacked and standing for themselves when abused and leaving when not respected but not going violent just to tip the scale.

And finally comes lust, which from my perspective, noones business. Everyone should be free to express it in whichever way they are comfortable with. If you see it a sin, do not do it but do not impose your rules on another, period.

My main feeling after finishing the book is that it might be too long for its content, with some ideas repeated a lot. I wasn’t wiser at the end of this read, just couldn’t prevent myself from questioning the amount of violence promoted here.

This is what jWoman had to say today.

My Readings: First day at work and Angry Feminism

 

It was my first day at work, I mean physically going to work, and meeting people in the flesh. As exciting as it was, it was exhausting. The commute was indeed exhausting, especially going back!!! I was lost, hot and drained. All schedules were fucked up and nothing accurate online and I wasn’t sure which way to go. But I am writing this from the train to Geelong, Marshall station. And from there I will need to figure out a way to go to Warun Ponds. Too much commute for one day.

I just hope I haven’t messed up taking this train.

I am reading a book by Mona El-Tahawy (The seven necessary sins for women and Girls). She is an Egyptian American Feminist preaching a feminist angry doctrine, that is her first lesson to girls, ANGER!!! 

I don’t agree with anger even if it is not violent or aggressive. Why should being a feminist mean being angry!!!! 

I am with peace, and standing for what we are in peace, anger brings more anger and more negative vibes. Why should we teach girls to be angry and teach boys to restrain themselves, these are her words. How is this even fair. I do not see anger against patriarchy as the solution.

When comparing that book to Anbar’s book (Memoirs of an Early Arab Feminist) , I cannot but bow respectfully to the feminist school that Anbar represents.

Rudeness, vulgarity and obscenity are what Mona preaches and asks girls to be. These are the true feminists or else they aren’t feminist enough, or traitors maybe!! 

This in itself is labelling and discrimination against women who appreciate modesty and respect. Why can’t I protest against the patriarchy without using the F* word and without yelling in anger and shouting. 

I do not see myself agreeing with her on any point. But I will continue reading the book, continue the journey I started with Mona and see where it takes me, just as I am seeing where this train will take me. Hopefully home.

Edit: I got home safely and I was lucky to have stuck to continue reading the book even though I wasn't agreeing with the first chapter :). See my next article for more.

Have a good day my friends.

This is what jWoman had to say today. 

https://www.jamesmurua.com/mona-eltahawys-the-seven-necessary-sins-for-women-and-girls-out-in-september/

My Readings: Memoirs of an Early Arab Feminist, Anbara Salam Khalidi

I believe that nothing just happens but everything happens for a reason. And this book fell into my hands for a reason. I have to admit that my history knowledge is not all that thorough and there are gaps in history which I know nothing about, I might have some vague ideas about different nations and what they went through, that I might have gathered from conversations with others, friends, senior family members or even from novels or movies. The Lebanese and Palestinian events at the end of the 19th century and the start of the 20th was one of those. And I was not aware of the role women played in this history and in shaping the future of Arab women.

This book was enlightening and beautiful, drawing a picture of the Lebanese social structure in that era, first under the declining Ottoman empire, then under the French occupation. This made me more interested to read more about these times and get to know more about other influential women like Huda Shaarawi, May Ziadeh, Malak Hifni Nassif among others.

The most painful part of the book was the part of her life spent in Palestine as she witnessed first hand the legal and illegal immigration of Jews to grab land and evacuate Arabs out of their homes and the Zionist propaganda. This part of history has been written and rewritten from different point of views. What I know is that whichever way you looked at it, it was a humanitarian disaster and no means can be justified by the end.

I have to say I am grateful to Anbara and all her contemporary women who fought for liberation and rights of women. If it wasn’t for them, my life won’t be as easy as it is today. It is still to this day challenging being a woman but it is not compared to being forbidden to learn, talk or walk the streets without permission of a male guardian and without a veil that hides even my eyes. The darkness they rebelled against gained up the light we live in.

Gaining PhD. degrees and travelling on my own to foreign countries, the luxury of chosing where you want to live and work, the freedom to chose to live alone were not an option in those time.

So, THANK-YOU LADIES!

It is a highly recommended book which is easy to ready and which gives you insights into historical events and social structure of a different era. 

The n-dimensionality of life: reading the Alexandria Quartet

 I first read the Alexandria quartet, years ago, many years ago, maybe during school or university. Honestly I am not sure when, and indeed I don't think I read all the 4 books. What I am sure of is that i read the first half of Justine and I think I never finished it.

Years later, I am hear again picking up the book and starting from the start. I am now mid-way through the third book and I have to stop to breathe. Durell is just fascinating, he has blown my head up.

Finishing "Justine" (Book 1), I was breathless filled with emotions of rage and sympathy. Images of my cosmopolitan city with the layers of different people walking her streets and creating a portrait that was so full on for anyone to take in. But reading Justine left me missing something, I felt I was imprisoned in a 1-D cell, that is the narrators view of things, his experiences with bits and pieces that were not enough to me.

Then came "Balthazar" (Book 2), to add in multiple more dimensions, and seeing that even while we think we know it all and we are the heroes of our own stories, this is not wholly true. In the unfathomable depth and abstraction of human relationship, nothing is simple or 1-D. Every character know has more to give, more to fascinate my mind and pop up even more questions. We can see the bewilderment that Balthazar comments brings on the narrator who has banished himself to a far away island after the disappearance of Justin and the death of Melissa. All the known facts of his life are rattled by comments interlinear by Balthazar into his manuscript, into his history, into his life story. 

"Mountolive" (Book 3) came as a surprise, the narrator is no where to be found, and we finally have a name for him "Darley". He is described as "a good fellow, gentle and resigned, with a shyness that goes with great emotions imperfectly kept under control". And suddenly our narrative is insignificant and has no effect on events, he is no more the center of the universe.

I remember the event (Book 1 or 2) when Justine faces here harasser, for whom she carries such anger and pain that seemed to possess her and her life for years, and suddenly he do not even remember the event. It has slipped from is memory as insignificant, while the event consumed her and so many other people around her for years. How invested can a person be in an aspect of life where he has the illusion that other people are sharing the emotion and being consumed in it while the truth is in another story we are just as insignificant as Darley is in Mountolive's story.

I still have a bit og Mountolive and the whole book of Clea.

This is what jWoman has to say for now.

I want peace. What do you want?

What is your plan? Where do you want to be in 5 years?
Where do you see yourself?

What if I have no answer to these questions?
Does this means I am a loser?! Am I a failure then?
I am not retiring and I am still passionate but I don't have a 5 year plan.

I do not want to compete with anyone, nor have an eye on a post or name tag I an yearning to achieve. All I look for is peace and a fulfilling job. Is this wrong?

They say it is wrong. HR won't accept this, an interviewer won't accept this and a big boss won't too. My question is why?

But wait here, what I just said does not mean that I will accept to be trodden on or exploited or wrongly treated.

I enjoy doing my job well, want to be appreciated and can efficiently lead, as much as I am an effective team player.
I enjoy helping others, being of use, teaching and mentoring people to find their way and their voice.

I want to take life as it comes in peace. What do you want, my friend?



This is what jWoman has to say today.

The aftermath of COVID-19

We are stil in the amidst of this pandemic but everyone is thinking what next? How will we emerge from this pandemic. What will be the norm after this period of lockdown and isolation?

Media all over the world is trying to promote the idea of coming together. Everywhere you see or hear an ad, explaining to you how closer communities are. But the question is, is this true?

Did COVID-19 bring us together or had it thrown as further apart?..............................

In my everyday life, I hear and even witness increased discrimination against people with Asian features. A doctor from melbourne was on the news a few weeks ago, telling about how he was called names in the street, just because he was Chinese.

And in different places such as UK, Australia, Egypt, Japan and all over the world, nurses and medical staff are harassed, prevented from entering the buildings where they lived, becuase other residnece where scared the nurses will bring with them infection into theit homes. Governments evern asked them not to wear scrubs outside hospitals so as not to be identified.
Domestic violence is on the rise everywhere in the world. Domestic violence against women is increasing, women who hide from abusive partners by going to work or doing other activities are no more able to do it. On the other hand, abusive partners have no pubs or clubs to vent their anger and frustration but on their partners with whom they locked up under the same roof.

Media only showed us people clapping and waving towards medical staff, and people smiling at each other, and families happily spending time at home.

So where next?
Once countries start to ease up restrictions, and people are allowed to go out and about. How will our social behaviour change?
Can we trust a fellow human on the street any more?
Can we get back close together? or was it an unnecessary behaviour that we grew accoustomed to and it is time to change?

I have no answers but we will have to wait and see......


This is what jWoman has to say

A time of Covid-19

A time of Covid-19

It is the strangest of times. It is the time of self-isolation, and a time of connecting. It is a time of fear and a time of faith with church doors closed. It is a time for staying home and even a time for work from home. People walking alone, friends saying hi through cameras and microphones. Singles are more single then they ever has been and families are closer then ever before. Schools kept empty, roads with no cars, shops with closed doors and priests praying alone with no congregation. What a world 2020 brought on us, an extreme world

It is Easter (Orthodox Easter), but feels nothing like Easter. No church services, no gathering family members for a long delicious Easter dinner and lunch, no chocolate exchange and easter bunny hunt.

Nature is blooming while humans are locked down in their homes. Wild animals are seen in once-crowded-now-empty city centres. These are the times we are living in now. 

The world governments in chaos, some are throwing blame, others begging for help and some bickering at their own politics. 

And so we live in a different world, on a different earth and having faith that we might at some point get back  a part of what we used to call normal life.

Stay safe my friends and have a great Orthodox Easter.

Inspired from first paragraph of Dicken’s A Tale of two cities.

jWoman in the time of Covid-19